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Note: This review is also featured on Send More Cops.
There’s more to a zombie movie than brain-eating, dismemberment, and finding clever ways to dispose of the zombie threat.
Granted, there are a lot of people out there who want nothing more out of their zombie flicks. No matter how idiotic the rest of the movie, if [...]
It’s currently 3:15 am. I have to be at work (for a double shift) at 11:00am. Realistically, I should be in bed right now, catching up on some much-needed beauty sleep.
I should have come home after work tonight and gone to sleep at a responsible time. But I just couldn’t wait.
I should [...]
Lifeforce (1985)
What the hell was that?
Okay, I’ve got to admit it. Before Lifeforce was chosen as the latest (and my first) entry in the Final Girl Film Club, I really didn’t know anything about it. I mean, yeah, I’d heard it mentioned in passing, but I pretty much thought that it was considered [...]
Prophecy (1979)
Somebody should’ve shown Prophecy to M. Night Shyamalan. This is how you do environmental horror, sir. Actually, I’m going to start referring to this kind of film as “Greensploitation.” I’ve got a feeling we’ll be seeing more of these in the near future what with how enviro-conscious everyone is these days.
Ah, [...]
The Happening (2008)
I’m really going to try to be nice about this (at least, nicer than I was on my first attempt).
I’m not sure what happened to the promising young director who brought us The Sixth Sense a few years ago, but surely this atrocity wasn’t really directed by the same guy.
I mean, I’d heard [...]
Fuck this movie.
Vampires (1998)
“How do you like your stake, bitch?!”
That line, uttered by Daniel Baldwin (he’s the fat one!) is either really cheesy or really awesome. I can’t decide.
And that’s sort of the problem that I have with the whole movie. It’s got a cool concept. Vampire slayers, hired by the Catholic [...]
The Machine Girl [Kataude mashin gâru] (2008)
If the trailer for The Machine Girl doesn’t make you want to see the movie, then there’s not much that I’d be able to do to change your mind. If that sort of over-the-top, blood-spattered roaring rampage of Japanese revenge doesn’t get your juices flowing, then I’ve [...]
From Beyond (1986)
I’m ashamed of myself. Before tonight, I’d painted Stuart Gordon as a one-trick pony. Re-Animator. I’d seen a couple of his other films, like Dagon and Castle Freak, and…well… they were okay. Good enough. But just barely beyond the realm of awful. And his season 1 Masters [...]
The Strangers (2008)
These days, there seems to be two types of horror films in mainstream America. You’ve got the so-called “torture porn” films like Hostel and Saw. Or you’ve got remakes — either or foreign films like One Missed Call or Shutter*, or of classic horror films, like Prom Night (not that the [...]
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